Growth

Unlearning, learning and discovery

Unlearning old habits and ways of being that no longer serve me gives way to radical growth and prosperity. Heard this while listening to a podcast(affirmations of a black woman) and it left me wondering but now I get it and now I fully understand. Just like I’ll always say “This life thing doesn’t have a manual and we all just keep discovering”.

Growth most times appears not to be there and most times going through the process is a tedious and not so easy one. I’m not talking of your physical growth I’m talking of your person. Yes you! These past few months I’ve cried, laughed, gone through existential crises but tried to appear sane and keep pushing even when it seems like all my zeal and strength is literally gone. Little did I realize that it was all growth and that most times for all these to take place it might require my going into solitude. It’s funny how we all are growing in different areas but then we just don’t realize till we realize(lmao yes I know). A few days back I shared on my YouTube channel that I went through a self discovery journey and it actually sounded weird to some like “you mean you didn’t know yourself before?” The self discovery phase was a means of growth for me. I came to the realization that most times I am the one at fault, yes!! It’s not others it is me. I also got to realize that emotionally I wasn’t in control of my emotions and I actually thought I was but I wasn’t. I was accepting the bare minimum, things not meant for me and literally going back to the gutter but here I was thinking that I’m a baddie that got her thing together (lol thank God for salvation though). I had to unlearn a lot of things during that process and I felt away from the world. I never really knew that I was undergoing some kind of growth process till I was faced with one of my emotional dilemma and I had to make a decision. For once in my entire life I made a decision without blinking, with no remorse. I chose what was best for me and immediately I did I felt this certain joy in my heart,I didn’t know when I shouted this is growth(celebrate your small wins they say). I realized that I was in control of my emotions and just then I started reflecting on how I’ve been living since I was in this kind of phase I didn’t understand and I saw that it was a whole lot of change. I am evolving!!!

Growth can be so demanding, painful, stressful most times you feel you are alone but the truth is there is this part of growth that overshadows everything and that’s the joy. The fact that you are becoming a better version of yourself, you are not the same way you used to be and the fact that you are not stagnant. Growth is a process you should fall in love with. It’s all part of life’s transition, the ability to evolve. If there is one important thing I keep getting from this process it’s the lesson of boundaries, the fact that you can give out your all to people and not get it back and sure it’ll hurt because my love you are human but don’t let that be a determining factor of anything.

My writings/email is beginning to get so personal,I might as well soon start ranting to you guys about my love life. Lol!

Also got that young ladies should wake up before 8am every day, cook, clean, sweep, then kneel down and wake our kings while politely stating that breakfast is served. If you are a young lady and you read this email and end up waking up after 8am then prepare to be single(lmao sarcasm💜)

Have a great Sunday.

With love~ Chimamanda