Healing is weird

We all need it though

I went from ghosting on all my socials to ghosting in reality and then my newsletters. I wanted to write on healing, picked up my phone and dropped it because this healing thing was just so strange. It’s a process you undergo most times without even knowing you are in that process. Imagine healing from something you once loved or a feeling. Most times healing requires us to let go of certain things and even withdraw. Healing can also make you question your sanity(I had to change my environment to heal completely). It’s actually okay healing from things you know but healing from what you don’t know or something you can’t even pin point, now that’s weird. I figured out that healing has a way of making you connect with your inner self in a way you may not understand. I had to heal from different traumas at once(that’s why I can even talk about it now). During this process I felt like a complete stranger to myself and of course as a cry baby I cried a lot(if people get rich by crying I’ll probably be a multi billionaire by now). At a point I started questioning life because I didn’t get why I have to be the one healing when life should be apologetic for the things it threw at me(I’ll always mutter then that life is a pot of beans with plenty stones lol) because why do I have to be the one withdrawing? I find that it’s so easy for people to say I’ve moved on than for them to actually move on. When you think that you’ve gone through something that has mostly changed your life in a not so exciting manner and you think you are moving past it, just when you think you are done it’s like

Boom! A relapse.

As crazy and good as healing can be, like Osas said “ I consciously try not to revolve my entire identity around it” cos to be honest their is just a lot to heal from even Nigeria!

I have my on and off days, most times it comes in form of anxiety, existential crisis and so on. Once this starts happening I know it’s a relapse so I withdraw for some time, do things I love, remind myself that whatever I’m healing from is because I’m supposed to have moved past it and it’s essential for growth and I have a conversation with God.

I’m writing on this because I want you to know that I too most times feel some type of way and you are not alone. Most times your feelings would draw you back and you would need to heal but you should not make your entire life revolve around it. Feel the emotions that come with it, speak to friends if you wish(my close friends love listening to me and I love them),live life, go out and do things you love, enjoy ,change environment, travel if you can and pray too.

If you enjoyed reading this please let me know. Screenshot your favourite part and post it. Share your healing experiences with me too cos I’ll love to read them. Share to your friends too. Meanwhile I’m thinking of starting a podcast, do you think I should?

I’ll try and be consistent 🤍

Your favorite girl~Manda🤍

If you’d love to support me, buy me coffee so I can keep writing https://getfidia.com/pay/manda/Manda